I finally got tickets for the late taping on Thursday, September 26, which would air on Friday, September 27. Feeling I could benefit from her experience as a Late Show audience member, I asked my good friend and half sister, Norma Jean (aka Marilyn Sargent) if she would meet me there.

We agreed on a meeting time of 3:00. My cousin in NJ, feeling disappointed that I didn't ask him (because he couldn't care less about The Late Show or Dave), set about finding a way to get in on the action. And oh my, did he find a way!

I stayed at the Best Western President, on 48th at Broadway. My room was the size of a walk-in closet, but it was relatively cheap by NYC standards. And it was only a 5-minute walk from the Ed.

Walked to the Ed early Thursday morning, 9:30 or so. I don't know what I expected to be going on at that hour, but I genuinely had nothing on my mind but seeing Dave, I couldn't even make an effort to do any sightseeing. The standby ticket crowd was getting instructions from a page inside the lobby. During a lull I asked her what time the late taping ticketholders should get on line for numbering. She didn't know, went to ask somebody. 2:00 was the answer. Pat Farmer and some other stagehands were doing some carpentry outside the stage door on 53rd street - already a face I recognized. I had breakfast at the Hello Deli - no Rupert yet. Paul arrived soon thereafter, I wouldn't have expected him to be there so early.

Never saw Dave arrive. I spent hours walking around the neighborhood, never wandering too far, looking for that red Stealth. Bought a Late Show t-shirt for a friend back home, decided to go back to the hotel to drop off the shirt and freshen up. About 2 blocks from the Ed I passed Inky on his way to work.

When I got back to the Ed, about 1:15, there was already a long line of ticketholders, from the marquee to 54th street. I asked if they were all holding tickets to the early show. No, they were holding tickets for both shows; they would be numbered at the same time! What??? NUTS! So I got at the back of the line and could only hope most of the people in front of me were for the early taping. People on line were discussing what goes on before and during the taping, the seating procedures, what are the numbers for, questions about Dave, etc., and I kept answering their questions. Wow, you've been here before! they said. Nope, but I have a great source of information - the alt.fan.letterman usenet news group! Those guys made me sound smart, and that's not easy!

Meanwhile, my cousin and his friend, who had agreed to meet me at about 2:30 under the marquee, arrived early. I waved them down and explained why I was on line - they went somewhere to eat. When the tickets were finally numbered, I was pleasantly surprised to get numbers 15 and 16 for the second show - I was right, most of the people before me WERE for the early show.

By this time Rupert was standing in front of the Deli and I started a conversation, he's simply the nicest guy you could ever meet. We talked about his Jimmy segments, which he says can sometimes get a bit scary - no kidding! He genuinely liked it when Leonard Tepper joined him, it made him feel a little more secure than being by himself. He got a phone call and went inside - I looked down the street and saw Marilyn crossing Broadway, right on time.

Things really started to pick up when Marilyn got there, about 3:00. More onlookers were gathering and there was generally more action outside the Ed. We got great pix of Rupert, Paul, Will Lee, Donz5 from the a.f.l. news group(!), and Biff Henderson. We were clearly there to have as much fun as possible, the hell with good sense and decorum! As we proved when my cousin actually achieved what he'd set out to do - get us into the Ed for a backstage tour.

We were guided by a very nice young stagehand. The deeper inside the building we got, the more astonished Marilyn and I were. Suddenly there's the Ham Pez Dispenser. We're in the prop room! We're playing with the sound effects! We're in the control room, for cryin' out loud! Dave's gotta have his coffee, here's where it's made! What about a fridge full of hams?!? Cue cards for tonight's show? They're being written right now! I'm just walking in a daze, deeply hoping I'd catch sight of Dave wandering around, and suddenly I'm next to the skyline - we're at the back of the stage! Now we're on stage! Marilyn was taking pix of everything in sight! The band's rehearsing, and we're on stage with them! I'm looking at Dave's desk from the back! There's that spiral staircase - I told the stagehand that Marilyn and I could just sit up there, nobody'd notice. Well hell, it was worth a shot. We never did see Dave, by the way.

Then we're out in the lobby, and my cousin, who has no tickets for either show, manages to convince a Late Show staffer, to let him and his friend into the early taping, the Hugh Grant show. I couldn't believe it. We said goodbye then, because Marilyn and I were perfectly happy to be going to the 7:30 show with our own tickets. We left the theater.

I seem to recall killing some time, can't remember exactly how. Took a walk, had something to eat, stuff like that. We got back to the Ed to see the limo waiting for Hugh Grant. We saw a children's choir come out of a mobile dressing room, go into the Ed, and then come out again. We had no idea what was going on, of course, until we watched the show. For those of you who saw that show, remember how Dave mentioned he'd have to check out the lunar eclipse later that evening? Well, keep that in mind.

We saw Hugh Grant get into the limo. Seemed quite personable, signed some autographs. I'm not impressed with him, so I couldn't care less. All I could think about is that I'd been there all day and I'd seen just about everybody connected with the show except Dave.

We actually found my cousin exiting the theater after the show, and he said Dave gave away two hams that night. We talked a little more about the show, then he and his friend left to go back to NJ. Finally, on line for The Late Show, thought I'd never be here! We were behind a Manny lookalike who desperately wanted the ham. I said no, the ham's mine - I came all the way from Florida, hadn't slept but 2 hours in two days, and if I don't get the ham there will be many people disappointed in me. He says okay, if he has to lose it to anybody, he hopes it's me. Nice kid.

Don't remember the order of things, but there was the visit from Calvert Deforest, who loved posing for Marilyn's camera and ate up all the attention, and a young page named John who very clearly told us to rip the stub from our tickets and save the big part for ourselves, only to go ape when I, psyched and in shock over finally being where I was, said, "Who rips it, you or us?" It was quite hilarious, actually, I was too numb to be insulted. Duh! Then there's the bathroom break, of course, always a highlight, so I'm told. And then, and then, into the Ed! We were seated in the fourth row, over by Inky and Alan Kalter the announcer, in front of Dave's desk, 4th and 5th seats in - I think. I was ever so pleased to be on Dave's side.

While everyone else was putting on his/her coat, I was taking mine off because should the camera get on me, I'd told everyone I would be wearing my tie-dye T-shirt, so I couldn't cover it up. What should I do with my coat (denim jacket)? I wondered aloud. The strapping young man in the seat in front of me told me I could give it to him, because he was freezing his ass off. So I did. He wore it through the entire show, but politely asked me at each break if I wanted it back. Nah. I suppose I was a bit chilly, but I was also way too jazzed to care.

Out comes Wally, out comes the band, and FINALLY, my first Dave sighting of the day - he was pacing back and forth behind the screen, waiting to be introduced. Then suddenly, there he is, center stage, looking just perfect. Up goes a woman's hand in the second row. Not yet, ma'am, I didn't ask yet! But no, she persisted. Right away, I knew that neither I nor anyone else was going to get his attention, this rude, hoggy woman was going to get the ham, because he kept going back to her. And who was it? Ms Markey the kindrgarten teacher who sends stuff in to the show! Now, hasn't Ms Markey had quite enough of Dave's attention? Yes, it was cute the first time, and it was cute the most recent time, but it wasn't cute this time because I was robbed of my ham! All that rehearsal, that witty patter about full moons and werewolves and bite me! Down the tubes! She gave him an invite to her kindergarten's upcoming milk and cookie party or some such drivel - so much for all the instructions about leaving presents for Dave with the pages! The good news is - she didn't get a ham!

Okay, on with the show. Now, anyone who saw the show knows it was not one of the best. Dave, of course, was perfect. He was adorable. I never took my eyes off him, except when my view was completely, totally and utterly obstructed by people or equipment. That wasn't often. I loved watching him during the breaks, when I could see him. He's standing behind his desk with one foot up ON the desk. He's making faces at nobody. He's deep in conversation with Rob. That's all I cared about, I didn't give a damn about Kirstie Alley's kidfart stories, or Matthew Broderick's clean/dirty stained glass windows. By the way, does anybody know what the hell he was talking about?

During one of the breaks, when I couldn't see Dave for the crowd surrounding him, I glanced around and saw Alan Kalter staring at me. So I stared back just to be sure. Then he waved. I waved back. He held something in his hand and asked if I wanted it, then threw it to me. I didn't know what it would be, but I actually managed to catch it (not an easy task - nobody ever wanted me on their team!) and it was a hand warmer! What a nice guy!

I knew the comedian, Brian Regan, wasn't going to make it on, but wouldn't it have been nice to cut short both Kirstie and Matthew in favor of some real entertainment? So much for my opinion.

All too soon, the show was over. Goodnight everybody! and Dave's gone. The young man wearing my coat found my camera in the pocket and took a picture of Marilyn and me in our seats at the Ed. I love the pic. As people were filing out, I noticed a man on his knees before a woman in the front row. He took out a ring box. He was proposing to her! She accepted! They got engaged on the night of the full moon and the lunar eclipse, at The Late Show With David Letterman! Now there's a story for their kids!

I saw Alan Kalter in the lobby and ran over to him and thanked him profusely for that nice gesture. That guy's just one big smile. He produced a pencil, which he says Dave threw at him, and gave it to Marilyn.

Out the lobby doors, and my experience as a Late Show audience member was at an end. But the best was yet to come.

After the show we went around to 53rd street to check out what was going on, and I seem to recall things went nuts. We saw Alan again - I snapped his picture, which surprised him, but rather than putting him off, he ran over to Marilyn and put his arm around her, then a stagehand ran next to him! I'm screaming this is great! this is great! and took what is one of my favorite pix of the whole day because we didn't even ask for it, those guys just did it. Then we saw Tony 'Inky' Mendez walking out and we both kinda sprinted around a mobile dressing room, giggling like kids, and ambushed the poor guy on the other side. That's why he's laughing in both our pix, I think he got a kick out of our exhuberance!

We caught Matthew Broderick walking out to his limo, and although it couldn't be heard above all the other nonsense that was going on, our totally tasteful Norma Jean yelled, Hey Matthew! You tanked! How true.

It was dark, people started to drift away, things got quiet, and the lunar eclipse was happenin'. We walked across to Roy Rogers for some coffee and donuts (which I left in a bag outside the Ed, shame on me), and when we came back things were very quiet indeed, so we tried to take pix of the eclipse, which we knew wouldn't turn out, but what the heck. We sat on a stoop outside the Ed and compared our little gifts from Alan - mine's soft and hot, I said - ah, but mine's long .... and hard! says Marilyn. Proving, even outside the Ed Sullivan Theater, with Dave several stories above us, Limo Ladies will be Limo Ladies. We even took pix of ourselves with these gems. Hey, we were anxious, alright?

Miss Saigon was still in performance across the street, so 53rd wasn't exactly deserted yet. A charter bus was parked right along the stage doors, waiting for a crowd to exit. We're still a distance away from the extrance to the office building, when we see Paul run out, look up, look this way and that way, then run back in. We looked at each other - what the heyyllll was that? Whatever it was, it warranted getting closer to the door, so that's what we did. No more Paul. There's always a guard out there, at this time it was a young guy who took himself way to seriously. We kept our distance and chatted to each other quietly.

With the charter bus still parked right there, a small group of people came out to check out the eclipse. One of them was a tall guy in sweats - oh my GOD, it's Dave! This very bizarre noise comes out of my mouth - dave-DAVE!! Just like that, twice in rapid succession. He doesn't turn around and Laurie Diamond, his assistant, is on us immediately, telling us that nobody realizes Dave is out here right now, and as long as we don't take photos or approach him, he won't have a problem. Man, she's good. He's going to change soon, and when he leaves, I PROMISE you .... something. She promised us something. Help me, Marilyn - did she promise we could take pictures? Talk to him? Take him home? Whatever, she kept us at bay long enough for Dave and whoever was with him to realize they couldn't see the eclipse because it was hidden behind a skyscraper and go back in. We shook her hand and told her it was a pleasure to meet her, schmooozed our little hearts out, then she went in.

Marilyn laughed because he was wearing sweats. I said, but he looked sooo good in them. She stopped laughing and said - yeah, he did!

Okay, she promised. Here's the drill - I give you the camera, I grab him, you take a picture, then we'll switch. Yeah, as soon as the car comes around, we have it made! That's the plan. Except he could still blow us off, he has that right, it's been a long day (it was about 11 pm by this time) and the last show tanked (thanks, Matthew!).

Shortly someone comes running out of the door saying he was bringing the car around, or something like that - not talking to us. Car? Bringing the car around? Really????? A few minutes later, there it is, red and shiny, with a young woman at the wheel. She's on the phone, probably saying something like, "The car's here. There's still the same two women, they don't look too bright. Maybe if you ignore them they won't even notice you."

Well, he tried, but it didn't work. Here it comes again - dave-DAVE! What the hell is WRONG with me???? Since his attempt to escape didn't work, he turned around and became DAVE LETTERMAN - FRIENDLIEST MAN IN SHOWBIZ! (put a little echo on that, willya?) I extend my hand. He takes it, very firm grip, says something very nice - Pleased to meet you! -or- Pleasure to meet you! -or- Nice to meet you! Hey, I was numb, Dave was holding my hand, am I expected to actually be AWARE of stuff???? He pretty much pulled me to his side, kept a hold of my hand cause he wanted to know where it was at all times, and flashed that killer smile. Marilyn took the picture, we switched, repeated the drill. Thanks Dave! I said (at least it wasn't, thanks dave-DAVE!). He said something equally nice in parting, which I can't remember either. He and Laurie got in the car and he sped off. The whole event took about 30 seconds.

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